|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 |
|
| Author |
Message |
|
|
 |
Wed Dec 21, 2011 9:09 am  |
I believe, yes. Emotional stress causes your hormones to change. In my case, it also made me unable to eat for long periods of time. I guess this is just the crucible of living; and I do believe that suffering helps us become more ourselves. Certainly one is inclined to self reflection at these times, and sometimes being abandoned can bring back other emotional traumas from the past that are not healed. It is hard, but try to USE this pain to help yourself feel stronger from within.
One thing that really helped me was a suggestion from Louise Hayes: Never pass a mirror without looking into it and telling yourself that you love youself and YOU will take care of yourself and that all will be well.
As in: ___________ I love you with all my heart and I will alway take care of you and make sure everything turns out well.
You will get over this. You will become more and more your true self. You will love and feel happy again.
The only person who you can be sure will never let you down is yourself. You are stronger than you know - and you are blessed with ability to feel & love deeply.
My heart goes out to you mismis |
|
|
Chispa
New Member
 
Joined: 01 Jan 2005
Posts: 3
|
|
|
Tue Jan 03, 2012 12:38 am |
Nothing, absolutely NOTHING has aged me more than heartbreak.
And you had TWO - the ending of a relationship and the loss of your pregnancy.
My heart hurts for you, Beautiful (Italian) Ocean/Change (Japanese). (Translation of your screen name.)
As for the relationship part...
Here is the good news: I've had my heart broken so badly that I thought I'd never recover. Not once. Not twice. Three times. And each time I did recover.
Not only that, but each time I recovered, I was rejuvenated and glowed just as much as when I had that first teen-aged crush. And the scars from those heartbreaks have only accentuated the Beautiful OceanChange. Some of the damage goes away and the parts of it that remain only make you more beautiful.
Spend some quality time with friends. Did you neglect any friendships when you were in that relationship? Call those people and meet them for coffee, lunch, happy hour. Friendships are so sustaining - you'll feel supported and at the same time reminded that there's a YOU that is so important to people.
Take care of yourself. It's a great step that you posted here and reached out. But make sure that you continue to do things like that. In terms of the focus of this forum - continue your skincare routine. (Routines, in general, are healing. Make yourself a cup of green tea and do nothing but listen to good music for ten minutes at the same time every day. Or get a bunch of potted plants and groom and water them every day before you start work. Or walk to a neighborhood coffee shop every day to get a cuppa joe and walk back drinking it. Or find a bench with a view nearby, spend five minutes a day appreciating how lucky you are to be sitting there at that moment. You get the idea....) Routines become ritual. Even if it's just taking off your makeup before you go to bed - all those rituals can be healing ways of taking care of yourself.
Fight bitterness. You think heartbreak is aging? Look at bitter people. 'Nuff said.
I am not pushing religion (in fact, it's NOT a religion if you accurately understand it) but to follow up on erg and LoriA's posts - studying Buddhism has healed me and given me much glow! Focus on suffering (not synonymous with pessimism!) and acceptance (not synonymous with complacency!). If you currently have a religion Buddhism need not conflict with it. Buddhism is a practice. It's not a worship or belief. You can (I do) have a Faith and still study the dharma. Sit in on a sangha or two or twenty if it's available nearby.
As for the miscarriage....
I hope you heal completely from this. But just in case, know that some wounds never completely heal. And that's okay.
There's a difference between honoring a painful thing and wallowing in it. With the former, you are acknowledging and paying respects. Totally fine. With the latter, a person is making it about themselves. Go ahead and honor that loss for the rest of your life whenever it comes up. And know that there are people out there like me who ache with you and understand.
I think you're going to be fine. I think you're going to live up to your screen name, Beautiful OceanChange.
Take care,
Chispa (Sparky/Lively) |
|
|
|
|
| Mon Dec 02, 2024 7:25 am |
If this is your first visit to the EDS Forums please take the time to register. Registration is required for you to post on the forums. Registration will also give you the ability to track messages of interest, send private messages to other users, participate in Gift Certificates draws and enjoy automatic discounts for shopping at our online store. Registration is free and takes just a few seconds to complete.
Click Here to join our community.
If you are already a registered member on the forums, please login to gain full access to the site. |
|
 |
|
|
|
