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Thu Mar 15, 2007 8:16 am  |
I recieved this via email this morning and I just had to share it with the ladies on the forum (the guys might find it hilarious also)  :
>Subject: Maxi Pads
>
> MR. JAMES THATCHER BRAND MANAGER, PROCTER & GAMBLE.
> - - - -
> Dear Mr. Thatcher,
>
>I have been a loyal user of your Always maxi pads for over 20 years, and I
>appreciate many of their features. Why, without the LeakGuard Core or
>Dri-Weave absorbency, I'd probably never go horseback riding or salsa
>dancing, and I'd certainly steer clear of running up and down the beach in
>tight, white shorts.
>
>But my favourite feature has to be your revolutionary Flexi-Wings. Kudos on
>being the only company smart enough to realize how crucial it is that
>maxi-pads be aerodynamic. I can't tell you how safe and secure I feel each
>month knowing there's a little F-16 in my pants.
>
>Have you ever had a menstrual period, Mr. Thatcher? Ever suffered from "the
>curse"? I'm guessing you haven't. Well, my "time of the month" is starting
>right now. As I type, I can already feel hormonal forces violently surging
>through my body. Just a few minutes from now, my body will adjust and I'll
>be transformed into what my husband likes to call "an inbred hillbilly with
>knife skills." Isn't the human body amazing?
>
>As brand manager in the feminine-hygiene division, you've no doubt seen
>quite a bit of research on what exactly happens during your customers'
>monthly visits from Aunt Flo. Therefore, you must know about the bloating,
>puffiness, and cramping we endure, and about our intense mood swings, crying
>jags, and out-of-control behavior. You surely realize it's a tough time for
>most women. In fact, only last week, my friend Jennifer fought the violent
>urge to shove her boyfriend's testicles into a George Foreman Grill just
>because he told her he thought Grey's Anatomy was written by drunken chimps.
>
>Crazy! The point is, sir, you of all people must realize that America is
>just crawling with homicidal maniacs in capri pants. Which brings me to the
>reason for my letter.
>
>Last month, while in the throes of cramping so painful I wanted to reach
>inside my body and yank out my uterus, I opened an Always maxi pad, and
>there, printed on the adhesive backing, were these words: "Have a Happy
>Period."
>
>Are you f*****g kidding me?
>
>What I mean is, does any part of your tiny middle-manager brain really think
>happiness - actual smiling, laughing happiness - is possible during a
>menstrual period? Did anything mentioned above sound the least bit
>pleasurable? Well, did it, James? FYI, unless you're some kind of sick S&M
>freak girl, there will never be anything "happy" about a day in which you
>have to jack yourself up on Motrin and Kahlua and lock yourself in your
>house just so you don't march down to the local Walgreens armed with a
>hunting rifle and a sketchy plan to end your life in a blaze of glory. For
>the love of God, pull your head out of you ass man. If you just have to slap
>a moronic message on a maxi pad, wouldn 't it make more sense to say
>something that's actually pertinent, like "Put Down the Hammer" or
>"Vehicular Manslaughter Is Wrong"? Or are you just picking on us?
>
>Sir, please inform your accounting department that, effective immediately,
>there will be an $8 drop in monthly profits, for I have chosen to take my
>maxi-pad business elsewhere. And though I will certainly miss your
>Flexi-Wings, I will not for one minute miss your brand of condescending
>bullshit. And that's a promise I will keep.
>
>Always,
>
>Wendi Aarons Austin , TX
> |
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PROUD FTM @ 40 TO CARTER-BORN APRIL 12, 2006...Sensitive dry skintype...prone to excema |
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Thu Mar 15, 2007 8:21 am |
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!!!
I SO needed this today. |
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32, Fair Skin, combo/break-out prone. Simple routine of REN No. 1 Purity Cleansing Balm and Argan oil as a moisturizer; Clarisonic when needed. That's it! |
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Thu Mar 15, 2007 8:28 am |
 MAO
wholy crapper, Batman, that was the funniest thing I have read in ages... my husband will NEVER let me get a George Foreman after reading this little gem...
| Quote: |
In fact, only last week, my friend Jennifer fought the violent
>urge to shove her boyfriend's testicles into a George Foreman Grill just
>because he told her he thought Grey's Anatomy was written by drunken chimps. |
How I can relate to this!!   |
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SKIN: combination, reactive to climate changes and extremely fair. "Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the only time of the month that I can be myself." --Roseanne |
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Thu Mar 15, 2007 8:30 am |
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53 and starting to show it |
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Thu Mar 15, 2007 9:46 am |
| Well she was obviously NOT having a "happy period" when she wrote that letter. LOL |
_________________
Global Butterfly & Certified Aromatherapist/Holisitc Therapist with a passion for travel and natural health. |
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Thu Mar 15, 2007 9:50 am |
| feels so good right after get up~~~funny |
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Thu Mar 15, 2007 10:24 am |
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Thu Mar 15, 2007 10:46 am |
Wonderful!
But tell me, do they really have that annoying little greeting printed on them?  |
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Thu Mar 15, 2007 10:55 am |
I used to buy whatever brand is cheaper; however, once, my bf told me that I should be grateful about it, it's just part of woman's life and if I felt it's annoying, try to think in positive way and be happy since we got to use or buy one thing that guys don't have the luxury to do so. So, I have changed my opinion about period in a much better way....
So, enjoy it! At least you got an excuse to spend money and use whichever brand you want... |
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Thu Mar 15, 2007 10:58 am |
| Good one! |
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Thu Mar 15, 2007 12:45 pm |
| This is so funny. I don't get any cramp during my periods or before usually. However some months, I can overreact to things and take things the wrong way just prior to getting a period. Still it doesn't happen every month. But I totally can sympathize with the woman who wrote the letter. |
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Thu Mar 15, 2007 12:59 pm |
LOL.. poor her. I never get any cramps during my period or before either.. maybe just moodswings!  |
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Thu Mar 15, 2007 3:00 pm |
| fishzebby wrote: |
I used to buy whatever brand is cheaper; however, once, my bf told me that I should be grateful about it, it's just part of woman's life and if I felt it's annoying, try to think in positive way and be happy since we got to use or buy one thing that guys don't have the luxury to do so. So, I have changed my opinion about period in a much better way....
So, enjoy it! At least you got an excuse to spend money and use whichever brand you want... |
I think I'd of been put in jail, after I got thru beating him up for that statement! |
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Thu Mar 15, 2007 3:43 pm |
| MelissaMarie wrote: |
| fishzebby wrote: |
I used to buy whatever brand is cheaper; however, once, my bf told me that I should be grateful about it, it's just part of woman's life and if I felt it's annoying, try to think in positive way and be happy since we got to use or buy one thing that guys don't have the luxury to do so. So, I have changed my opinion about period in a much better way....
So, enjoy it! At least you got an excuse to spend money and use whichever brand you want... |
I think I'd of been put in jail, after I got thru beating him up for that statement! |
Oh yes indeed. |
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Thu Mar 15, 2007 4:18 pm |
| fishzebby wrote: |
I used to buy whatever brand is cheaper; however, once, my bf told me that I should be grateful about it, it's just part of woman's life and if I felt it's annoying, try to think in positive way and be happy since we got to use or buy one thing that guys don't have the luxury to do so. So, I have changed my opinion about period in a much better way....
So, enjoy it! At least you got an excuse to spend money and use whichever brand you want... |
Of all the condescending BS! After having my plumbing yanked at the ripe old age of 32 and not having to fiddle with hormones or any of that nonsense for the past 24 years, I can most assuredly tell ya the guys have it gooooood! He's snickering atya, baby girl. |
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Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor each morning the devil says, "Oh Crap, She's up!" Unknown |
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Fri Mar 16, 2007 7:34 am |
Thanks for sharing this moosette, laughter is such good medicine!
I don't mean to stray too much from the original topic, but for some reason this reminds me of a news blurb I watched on my local news a few years ago. The consumer specialist wowed his audience with yet another unconventional use for the maxipad. He strapped a maxi to each one of his knees then proceeded to demonstrate how these impromptu "kneepads" can give you more comfort when you're down on your hands and knees scrubbing the kitchen floor!!
I forget what the original topic of his program was, but I've never forgotten the image of a 3 piece suit with maxipad kneepads on the kitchen floor next to a bucket, scrub brush and with his sleeves rolled up!
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44 – combo/oily skin with a tendency towards clogged pores. Thanks to EDS, tweaked my skincare routine and normalized skin… no more breakouts. PSF, silk powder, Janson Beckett, Cellbone, NIA24 are staples. |
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Fri Mar 16, 2007 7:37 am |
Actually, he was pretty sincere about it when he said it. Plus, towards feminine stuff, he is pretty supportive.
Oh well...
Probably I am too dumb to read a guy with the real thought of it. |
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Fri Mar 16, 2007 8:03 am |
| Yes, I can relate. |
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Fri Mar 16, 2007 8:26 am |
| Ya know, in Australia the strip you peel off has stupid trivia knowledge on it. |
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SKIN: combination, reactive to climate changes and extremely fair. "Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the only time of the month that I can be myself." --Roseanne |
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Fri Mar 16, 2007 9:15 am |
If I accidentaly buy a brand that has "wings" I cut them off. They once got stuck to the skin on my upper thigh. Talk about a delicate move getting it unstuck 
Does anyone else cut those "wings" off? |
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Fri Mar 16, 2007 1:50 pm |
| donnababe wrote: |
Does anyone else cut those "wings" off? |
I just don't by the kind w/ wings 
I |
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Fri Mar 16, 2007 1:54 pm |
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Fri Mar 16, 2007 1:54 pm |
| fishzebby wrote: |
I used to buy whatever brand is cheaper; however, once, my bf told me that I should be grateful about it, it's just part of woman's life and if I felt it's annoying, try to think in positive way and be happy since we got to use or buy one thing that guys don't have the luxury to do so. So, I have changed my opinion about period in a much better way....
So, enjoy it! At least you got an excuse to spend money and use whichever brand you want... |
OMG If my DH ever said that to me I'd castrate him  Give me a f*****g break. What I wouldn't give not to have back aches every mo (the cramps went away after the 3rd kid ), not to mention to feel irrational, angry, sad, down, crying, fat, ugly and mad - ALL AT THE SAME GD TIME 
Until a guy walks in my hormonal shoes he just better stay on my good side during TTOM. It's also the reason my main doc is FEMALE  |
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Fri Mar 16, 2007 4:09 pm |
Whooooaaaa Body Formmmmm, Body Formmmmm for yooouuuu. Just off to do a bit of skating in hot pants with my puppy. |
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