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Looking old for age
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madalyn
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Sun Apr 06, 2008 4:05 am      Reply with quote
Hi everyone

I was 39 last week and am feeling really fed up about my fading looks- i went out with my friends and felt really old and ugly. I have got hyperpigmentation on my face ( too much sunbathing when young) for which I am using a product by PSF and have quite pronounced crows feet and nose to mouth lines which seem to be getting worse every week. During the day i use True Radiance eyecream, PSF vit c serum (which is very drying on my skin)pearl cream on my nose to mouth lines, followed by Olay total effects moisturiser and sunscreen by Clarins (protective day screen spf 40) as i have heard it is good if you have hyperpigmentation and allows me to wear makeup over the top.

At night i use psf lightening cream followed by pearl cream then emu oil. Three night a week i use retinA cream and use a facial flex daily and use a derma wand three times a week.

What i'd like to know ladies is am i doing anything detrimental to my face,is there anything better i could do or use( that doesn't cost the earth? Do you think i should use vit c serum, even though its drying as my skin is very dry anyway?
Also,i have a pumpkin peel sample from PSF - how long do i leave it on for?
and finally does anyone know of a good facial tanner - my body is naturally quite brown but obviously because of hyperpigmenttion i avoid sun on my face at all costs.
Thanks ladies - i look forward to your words of wisdom.
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Sun Apr 06, 2008 4:52 am      Reply with quote
Happy birthday from one 39 year old to another!

I'm not really able to answer most of your questions, since we have different skin problems. But I can tell you that the PSF Pumpkin peel is great (it's on my face right now). I left it on for 5 min. the first time to see how I did, and now I'm up to 20 min. I'm not sure I'll want to leave it on much longer than that. But I think different people leave it on for different lengths of time depending on their sensitivity and needs.

Sorry this b-day is making you feel old... I went through this at 37 (seemed just too close to 40) but I'm hoping I've gone through all the angst and next year will just enjoy the milestone. Good luck!

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Sun Apr 06, 2008 5:12 am      Reply with quote
Happy belated birthday! How I wish I was 39 yrs. old. When I was that age I was dreading 40 and now I am dreading 50. You are still very young! I use many of the products you are using except Vitamin C and I am about to add that to my routine. I have heard that Vivier Vitamin C is not drying but it is expensive. I also use copper peptides which have helped!
Where do you purchase your pearl cream?
MBGirl
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Sun Apr 06, 2008 6:50 am      Reply with quote
I think that the next best thing to a prescription for Retin-A is the Olay Regenerist line, which uses niacinimide and peptides. I think Olay is far better than the high-end skin care lines, as well as better than any other drugstore lines. Top quality product line.
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Sun Apr 06, 2008 7:51 am      Reply with quote
madalyn wrote:
Hi everyone

I was 39 last week and am feeling really fed up about my fading looks- i went out with my friends and felt really old and ugly. I have got hyperpigmentation on my face ( too much sunbathing when young) for which I am using a product by PSF and have quite pronounced crows feet and nose to mouth lines which seem to be getting worse every week. During the day i use True Radiance eyecream, PSF vit c serum (which is very drying on my skin)pearl cream on my nose to mouth lines, followed by Olay total effects moisturiser and sunscreen by Clarins (protective day screen spf 40) as i have heard it is good if you have hyperpigmentation and allows me to wear makeup over the top.

At night i use psf lightening cream followed by pearl cream then emu oil. Three night a week i use retinA cream and use a facial flex daily and use a derma wand three times a week.
What i'd like to know ladies is am i doing anything detrimental to my face,is there anything better i could do or use( that doesn't cost the earth? Do you think i should use vit c serum, even though its drying as my skin is very dry anyway?
Also,i have a pumpkin peel sample from PSF - how long do i leave it on for?
and finally does anyone know of a good facial tanner - my body is naturally quite brown but obviously because of hyperpigmenttion i avoid sun on my face at all costs.
Thanks ladies - i look forward to your words of wisdom.


If your skin is dry perhaps apply a moisturizer over True Radiance. If PSF C is drying try to sample other C's. CellularSkin RX, Vivier and Janson Beckett's Vitamin C don't dry my skin. PSF Pumpkin Peel is lovely. On a dry complextion only use once a week at most. Be sure your Pearl Cream is for dry skin. Years ago I used RetinA and my skin looked aweful (dry and red). Perhaps you need a mild Retinol.

These are a few thoughts I had when reading your post. BTW try a hydrating mask.

Happy Birthday Smile

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As I am getting older I realize my biggest beauty secret is smile more and frown less. Be aware that wrinkles do not make a person unattractive. Cynicism, unforgiveness, anger and jealousy are the real culprits. Sixty something Smile
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Sun Apr 06, 2008 7:56 am      Reply with quote
I look younger at 44 than I did when I was 39. It sounds like you've got a good skin-care regime going to try and address some of the sun-exposure damage and prevent more, which is great. But there are plenty of other things you can do, even if you're not willing to go the botox etc route (which I'm not, though never say never!).

Being the right weight, not too much over and not too much under, is one of the best things we can do for ourselves as we get older. Apart from it being aesthetically appealing and allowing us to wear clothes that won't unnecessarily age us, there are so many benefits to the skin when we eat and drink really well.

Other things that helped me in my 40s:

The right hair cut and colour - what worked for us in our early 30s might not anymore. This alone can take 5 years off a woman!
Well-shaped eyebrows.
The right makeup (there's a great thread going for makeup tips for 40+ ladies).
Manicures and, for spring and summer, pedicures.
Basically, maintaining ourselves well without looking like we're trying too hard. Smile

Most importantly: making the best of what you are so you can embrace it and not spend all your time wishing you were something else. Attitude is so important. I remember reading an interview with Anne Bancroft when she was 70. She said that at the time of the Graduate (when I think she was around 40), she was miserable because she thought she looked so old. With hindsight, she realised how great she really did look and wished she hadn't wasted so much time wishing she looked younger. It's true. I think about all the wisdom and confidence I've acquired that I didn't have when I was 20, and I'm proud to be the age I am.

Happy birthday!

Edit to answer onf of your specific concerns (and apologies for going on and on in this post): I understand you might be self-conscious about your hyperpigmentation, but self-tanners on the face can also be aging. There is some great advice here on EDS to help with hyperpigmentaion. I was able to get rid of mine entirely with tri-luma (though some don't like it because of hydroquinone), and as long as I avoid the sun religiously, it never comes back.

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Lola Moroney
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Sun Apr 06, 2008 8:43 am      Reply with quote
Happy Birthday oh how I wish I as 30 again or even 50 but I have been told that I do not look my age. I think that we spend far too much on day creams and serums all we need is a good moisturiser and sunfactor and we should splash out on a night cream and thats when our skin renews itself. The best night cream I have found (and have used loads) is Prevage the different I noticed very quickly and now my friends are commenting on it. Its only out here for a short while but has been in the states for ages. Its gets rid of age spots and gives my skin a lovely glow.
This is just my opinion and I do not use harsh products on my face as our Irish complexions are fair and prone to red veins.
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Sun Apr 06, 2008 9:08 am      Reply with quote
Don't forget your vitamins. If you do a search here there is some really great info. I will be 60 in 4 months and have just started supplementing with amino acids and l'arginine - hoping it will slow the hands of time.
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Sun Apr 06, 2008 10:18 am      Reply with quote
Forgive me, I can't remember if I read that you wore sunscreen. Do you wear sunscreen? Happy belated birthday btw!
madalyn
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Mon Apr 07, 2008 6:20 am      Reply with quote
Thanks for the replies, helpful advice and birthday wishes. Smile

Starlight- I bought the pearl cream on ebay its called Pien Tze Huang

Graceless_lady - You are very right in what you say. I do actually look after myself and take a pride in my appearance but having had a lot of attention because of my looks when younger i am finding it hard getting older - i am just too vain and shallow!!
Thanks again
Wink
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Mon Apr 07, 2008 6:31 am      Reply with quote
Happy Birthday! I really loved some of the replies here and would agree with everybody here.
Just keep smiling! Very Happy
madalyn
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Mon Apr 07, 2008 6:38 am      Reply with quote
Thanks Skincare
Tho - I think it was the smiling that gave me the wrinkles in the first place!!!!! Laughing
londonfan
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Mon Apr 07, 2008 7:11 am      Reply with quote
Happy Happy Birthday.
I noticed that when I read American Magazines, like Allure or Lucky, that I get depressed...It always seems that the normal women (not the models) of 40 or 50 years old look the same as I do now (32 years).
I do not look that old compared to the people in my town in the Netherlands, but I guess I would be given a higher age when going on holiday in the US.
Probably because the women in the US take better care of their skins? (or use restylane and botox earlier than the average Dutch person). I don't know. It makes me want to use restylane as well...
madalyn
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Mon Apr 07, 2008 8:18 am      Reply with quote
Hi Londonfan
I know exactly what you mean - i do feel that i maybe have unreal expectations.
I have also thought about botox/fillers etc but couldn't afford it on a regular basis and also think that some women who have had it done look a bit odd - they look young but you can tell that their not (if you know what i mean!!) and also there are so many things i am dissatisfied with looks wise (goofy teeth, pot belly, flat chest!!!) where would it ever end!!!! Confused
It's no good i'm just going to have to concentrate on my personality,stop looking in mirrors and stop my husband from wearing his glasses!!! Laughing
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Mon Apr 07, 2008 8:58 am      Reply with quote
I am 36, most people think I were under 30.
I also thought that my skin looks better than when I was 30.
I am so glad that I have given a trial to Obagi 3 years ago!! Very Happy
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Mon Apr 07, 2008 9:17 am      Reply with quote
HAppy Birthday...
My mother uses Olay Total Effect, but she said it is not good and it doesn't have any effect that it claimed.
May be you can try La Mer, it is a good skincare for mature skin.
Sidda
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Mon Apr 07, 2008 10:16 am      Reply with quote
Oh good grief, you don't need La Mer -- it is madly expensive and mostly mineral oil.

Olay Regenerist is a very good line. They have it locked up in the drugstores in L.A. Amazing.

And 39 is a hard age. 52 is easier. Laughing

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Mon Apr 07, 2008 11:25 am      Reply with quote
Sidda wrote:
And 39 is a hard age. 52 is easier. Laughing


I don't know if it's easier, we just have accepted things, that's all.
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Mon Apr 07, 2008 11:37 am      Reply with quote
Hmmm. I disagree. As noted before in this thread, the confidence and wisdom I have now that I did not have at 39 is a godsend. I haven't "accepted" anything -- except, perhaps, that my parents will never change. LOL Unless "accepting things" means they don't matter to me anymore?

Everyone's different. But getting older is not a curse. Stay healthy, active, and flexible, eat well, do what you can with skin actives and supplements, and do what you love with your life.

I'd much rather be the me I am now than the me I was at 39. No contest.

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Mon Apr 07, 2008 11:58 am      Reply with quote
madalyn wrote:
Thanks for the replies, helpful advice and birthday wishes. Smile

Starlight- I bought the pearl cream on ebay its called Pien Tze Huang

Graceless_lady - You are very right in what you say. I do actually look after myself and take a pride in my appearance but having had a lot of attention because of my looks when younger i am finding it hard getting older - i am just too vain and shallow!!
Thanks again
Wink


You're not shallow at all - or, if you are, then I am as well! I too have enjoyed positive attention and flattery because of my looks and, yes, it is difficult to see younger generations stealing the limelight. But I promise you that it doesn't entirely grind to a halt, even in your mid-40s Smile And it's almost always from much younger men than my own age, which makes it even sweeter! I am not vain enough to believe I look as good as I looked when I was 25, or that I could hold my own against all the lovely young women I see and admire, but there really is something to be said for that air of confidence - it's like a seductive perfume.

I remember seeing two young women on a beach a couple of years ago. One was 'technically' much prettier than the other, but it was almost as if she was too self-aware and she appeared a bit frozen. Meanwhile, her friend was animated, smiling,laughing and walking tall (good posture is another great "thinking young" trick); and when the two went in different directions, most eyes continued to follow the one with the smile. I try and adopt the same sort of principle in getting older. I might not have as much to work with as I once did but as long as I can make the most of what I have and believe in myself, I'm still hanging in there and refuse to be invisible!

It's great that you take pride in your appearance, as we all obviously do here on EDS. It says so much about a person, and all the right things too. Not at all shallow!

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Mon Apr 07, 2008 2:19 pm      Reply with quote
Happy birthday!!!

Regarding magazine pictures of women, PLEASE remember that there is a ton of airbrushing and electronic manipulation in photos. Don't compare yourself to unrealistic representations in the media. Also check out photos of celebrities without their makeup and stylists (and airbrushing, etc).

Some examples of airbrushing and celebrities without makeup:

http://homepage.mac.com/gapodaca/digital/bikini/bikini1.html (roll mouse over the photo to see the photo before it was "retouched")

http://seehere.blogspot.com/2006/08/celebrities-without-makeup.html

http://www.hilary.com/features/britney-spears.html

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Mon Apr 07, 2008 4:19 pm      Reply with quote
Good on you Sidda! Very Happy
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Mon Apr 07, 2008 6:12 pm      Reply with quote
londonfan wrote:
Happy Happy Birthday.
I noticed that when I read American Magazines, like Allure or Lucky, that I get depressed...It always seems that the normal women (not the models) of 40 or 50 years old look the same as I do now (32 years).
I do not look that old compared to the people in my town in the Netherlands, but I guess I would be given a higher age when going on holiday in the US.
Probably because the women in the US take better care of their skins? (or use restylane and botox earlier than the average Dutch person). I don't know. It makes me want to use restylane as well...


Don't get depressed. You can't always judge a book (or magazine), by it's cover....It's mostly smoke and mirrors. Airbrushing and editing hide a multitude of sins, with the finished result being perfection.

It's wonderful to feel well and look good, but somehow in the last several years it's become like an obsession, especially for the Hollywood actors and actresses, that still want to look 20 when their 60.. It's just a shame that TV, magazines and the like keep feeding this youth and perfection frenzy.

IMO they ought to show 'real' women + men of all ages + sizes, from all walks of life. In the real world, we're not all size 2 Barbie Dolls, + our DH's don't all look like George Clooney, and I totally resent those magazines + TV shows for implying we should. It's such a shame, that the insinuation they are allowed to make over and over again, is that 'perfection + youth' is all that matters.. It's so very sad.

So happy belated birthday to you madalyn, and enjoy every milestone that comes your way.

My wish for you and all of us, is that the next time we look in the mirror we see a woman, who radiates beauty from the inside out, which is the result of all of the lives she has touched, and the love that overflows in her heart.

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madalyn
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Tue Apr 08, 2008 4:30 am      Reply with quote
Well - i don't any look better but i certainly feel better Smile -Thanks for your words of wisdom and obviously if anyone finds a way of looking 15 years younger please let me know!!!! Wink
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Tue Apr 08, 2008 4:32 am      Reply with quote
madalyn wrote:
Hi Londonfan
I know exactly what you mean - i do feel that i maybe have unreal expectations.
I have also thought about botox/fillers etc but couldn't afford it on a regular basis and also think that some women who have had it done look a bit odd - they look young but you can tell that their not (if you know what i mean!!) and also there are so many things i am dissatisfied with looks wise (goofy teeth, pot belly, flat chest!!!) where would it ever end!!!! Confused
It's no good i'm just going to have to concentrate on my personality,stop looking in mirrors and stop my husband from wearing his glasses!!! Laughing


You are absolutely right. I do not want to get trapped in a cosmetic surgery * spam alert *. I think I have to keep it real and enjoy life!
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