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Visiting my SO's mum
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rainbow_listic
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Sun Apr 15, 2007 12:55 am      Reply with quote
my SO will be returning to Australia soon and i will be joining him later, for a vacation as well as visit his mum.

this is the first time i m meeting up with his mum, hence i m actually rather nervous. and i will also be staying at their place during the period.

i am thinking of buying something for her but i am clueless in what to get. and my stupid SO kept telling me that it is not necessary. but i felt that this is my first time meeting her and moreover i will be staying at their place hence it isnt so nice to go empty handed.

i really need some advise. what did you do to overcome the nervous feeling during your first visit to your SO or future-in-laws? or you dont feel nervous at all? any tips to share? and how do you dress? tia..

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Sun Apr 15, 2007 3:18 am      Reply with quote
I cannot remember if I was nervous the first time I met my inlaws. I probably was... Dress nice and casual, I don't think you have to dress up.

A gift is a nice thing (but men never see any point in it..). Do you know what she likes? My staples are flowers, swiss chocolate and nice wine.

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Sun Apr 15, 2007 10:19 am      Reply with quote
Yes, I would definitely take a gift. It's a nice gesture and shows that you're making a bit of an effort. I'm sure it would be much appreciated.

Schnee came up with some good suggestions. I think a beautiful bunch of flowers are especially good.
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Sun Apr 15, 2007 10:37 am      Reply with quote
Flowers and maybe a good supply of bath products. I like the wine and chocolates but what if she doesn't drink or is on a diet? So stick with simple pleasures all woman like! A nice thank you note after you left is always a great idea too!
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Sun Apr 15, 2007 10:53 am      Reply with quote
rainbow_listic wrote:
my SO will be returning to Australia soon and i will be joining him later, for a vacation as well as visit his mum.

this is the first time i m meeting up with his mum, hence i m actually rather nervous. and i will also be staying at their place during the period.

i am thinking of buying something for her but i am clueless in what to get. and my stupid SO kept telling me that it is not necessary. but i felt that this is my first time meeting her and moreover i will be staying at their place hence it isnt so nice to go empty handed.

i really need some advise. what did you do to overcome the nervous feeling during your first visit to your SO or future-in-laws? or you dont feel nervous at all? any tips to share? and how do you dress? tia..


Hi rainbow! So you'll be visiting your SO's Mum in Australia, right? Why not bring something nice from Singapore? (That's where you live, right?) You know, something like a merlion letter opener, pretty fan using traditional Sinapore-patterned material, wood carving, etc etc. As for how to dress, I would say err on the side of dressy. The first time I went to meet DH's parents I wore a longish skirt and a cashmere sweater. HTH!

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Sun Apr 15, 2007 2:00 pm      Reply with quote
Also agree that something unique to where you're from is always nice, and always err on the side of consumables (not just food, but things that are usable rather than something that will create clutter). Flowers are always appropriate, and never get anything that looks too spendy, it's awkward.
As far as dress goes, my uniform for parent meeting is a knee length a-line skirt and some sort of cardigan. Yes, I go for the uber sweet look. Can't go wrong there.
good luck, sounds fun!

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rainbow_listic
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Sun Apr 15, 2007 5:56 pm      Reply with quote
thank you ladies! all your advise are valuable to me!

i certainly never think of getting her flower! yes!! i shall ask my SO whats her fav. flower and also get her a bottle of red wine since she likes them. and maybe some specialities from Singapore (where i came from), where she might not be able to get in Australia.

ohh, sweet look!! LOL.. a knee-length skirt (nothing too short) or a dress with a cardigan. hiak..

as my SO is the only child and that his parents divorced when he was very young and his mum brought him up single-handedly. hence i kinda felt very pressurized when meeting with his mum. Sad

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Mon Apr 16, 2007 8:16 pm      Reply with quote
Good luck! Everyone gave you great advice. Don't forget to help with the dishes and clean up the place before you leave. Definitely send a nice thank you card is a must.

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Mon Apr 16, 2007 8:33 pm      Reply with quote
ohh!!! yes!! washing dishes... Laughing since i cant cook hence washing dishes is the least i can do. and if i m in-luck, i might even score some points in that area.

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Tue Apr 17, 2007 5:33 am      Reply with quote
I would pick something up from the airport - either one - and just add that you wanted to get her something in gratitude for her having you stay...it looks sweet and thoughtful, but not overdone and no connotations. Dont stress, us aussies are pretty relaxed sort of people and it REALLY is the thought that counts!! You will be fine! Very Happy
rainbow_listic
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Tue Apr 17, 2007 5:47 am      Reply with quote
actually both my SO and his mum are Singaporean but his mum have stayed in Australia for more then 15years.

i have never been to Australia before hence i was really looking forward towards the up-coming trip and at the same time stress.

guess i really need to relax myself, just be the usual me. things might not be that bad. Cool

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melissa49
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Tue Apr 17, 2007 5:52 am      Reply with quote
Yeah, just realx. After 15 years here, some of that "chill" must have rubbed off on her???!! Besides, although it is always worrying, if your SO loves you, then thats the main thing....
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Tue Apr 17, 2007 12:22 pm      Reply with quote
Laughing yes! thats what matters most ~ love and support from SO.

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Tue Apr 17, 2007 1:35 pm      Reply with quote
I wore jeans & a fringed leather jacket, maybe thats why she never liked me.

You come over as a lovely person. Just be yourself. Remember to relax and enjoy yourself.

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