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Mon Nov 23, 2009 10:30 pm |
This is a very strange question but please bear with me. I have a little girl who just turned three but she was born premature. She was only 2lb when she was born and spent a great deal of time in hospital and in kangaroo care with me. Kangaroo Care is where she lay on my chest skin to skin - it helps with bonding and it actually increased her oxygen levels when she was very ill.
I have very long hair and while she would lay on me my hair always was against her face, as she got older she would play with my hair and it became comforting for her to rub it on her cheek. This has led her into a habit of pulling her own hair out so she can rub it against her own cheek while she sleeps - it's become a habit to her.
We know have her in special sleep suits to prevent the hair pulling but the side she always pulled the most just won't grow out. It's fine, whispy and is about an inch long. On the other side of her head is beautiful curls to her shoulders. Being 3 she is now very upset about this and got really upset when she saw a little girl with long blonde hair and told me her hair was 'yuk'.
Are there any products you can think of that would help stimulate growth and thickness and still be very safe for such a young child? I'll take any recommendations I can get!! Thanks.. |
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Mon Nov 23, 2009 10:45 pm |
Im really sorry Im absolutely no help but I just wanted to send my well wishes to you both. That would be really awful to hear as a mother and go through as a little girl.
I can only suggest a doctor or naturopath(?) perhaps.
Best of luck with it all. x |
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Tue Nov 24, 2009 12:10 am |
Hey Sunlit... I'll tell you.. I'm a mom of twins, and hang with lots of other moms of twins. I have a girlfriend with girl girl twins, and one used to throw such a fit when she got upset she would pull her own hair out by the fist full. She is now 4.. and her hair is finally growing. Her sister's is easily 3 inches longer... But it IS GROWING... usually once they stop pulling their hair it will grow... It just takes a while...
Has she stopped the pulling? Does she understand that her hair is not growing 'cause it's been pulled out? You've probably already done this.. but just in case...if you have access, it may be worth having her evaluated for sensory problems. The hair pulling (since her hair pulling is likely soothing somehow) is not via tantrum, she may need something to tug ON? An occupational therapist might be able to guide you in finding an alternative source for soothing...Like kids that chew on their cloths and such. They NEED to chew, and they need certain textures. So there are now things that a parent can sew/clip onto clothing for the child to "work" on and not ruin their clothes... Then there can be behavior modification as she gets older.
If you think about how long it takes for a child to have a full head of hair since birth... it doesn't really seem odd that her hair is still short. Perhaps, in the mean time she can get special/pretty hair clips to pull it back, as if styled... I'm not really sure the appropriate response to her... perhaps just the simple truth. Honey, your hair is shorter on one side, 'cause you pulled it out. Now that you've stopped, it just needs some time to grow out and match the other side.
Dang... 3 is just so young to already be comparing to others...
2 lbs... WOW! Great job mom! |
_________________ Claudia of FlexEffect... 43, fair skin, occasional breakout, Using ECO FROG (my own=disclaimer), and TrueScience (I also sell this)... Happy with that...Come visit on FB! |
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Tue Nov 24, 2009 12:12 am |
I guess, I would also add that I wouldn't use anything to stimulate hair growth... with such a tiny body, I wouldn't want to "stimulate" any other cells in her body... It's so perfectly natural to want to protect her from the sadness this has caused... But, unless, the Dr.s are saying it's not going to grow back... Just re assure her that it WILL grow... |
_________________ Claudia of FlexEffect... 43, fair skin, occasional breakout, Using ECO FROG (my own=disclaimer), and TrueScience (I also sell this)... Happy with that...Come visit on FB! |
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Tue Nov 24, 2009 1:39 am |
I think that massaging once a day with some castor oil couldn't hurt and might just help? If there is a slight sensory issue going on it would be beneficial for that as well.
Obviously make sure her diet is optimum....or consider a good quality multi vitamin....
HTH
rebecca  |
_________________ 47 years old. Battling aging and pigmentation. Using Tria and Pico and Dermapen. |
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Tue Nov 24, 2009 8:12 am |
Sorry, as an RN, I have to recomend that you NOT use castor oil on such a young child... Skin absorbtion is one isse the other is - everything winds up in a child's mouth... |
_________________ I don't buy product from EDS so no agenda |
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Tue Nov 24, 2009 4:20 pm |
Alien wrote: |
Sorry, as an RN, I have to recomend that you NOT use castor oil on such a young child... Skin absorbtion is one isse the other is - everything winds up in a child's mouth... |
castor oil is a natural vegetable oil though, it's edible, how harmful could it be? |
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Tue Nov 24, 2009 5:01 pm |
Castor oil have been used for centuries as a natural and harmless method to improve various hair conditions. When I was growing up my mom used to rub castor oil into my hair couple of hours before washing, her mother did the same for her and so do a lot of people in different cultures, because it is thought to be beneficial for stimulating the growth of healthy and strong hair.
So, judge for yourself, but it did no harm to me. |
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Wed Nov 25, 2009 7:56 am |
So, your reccomending a LAXATIVE to be used on an already compramised infant?
Natural does not unequivicably equal safe |
_________________ I don't buy product from EDS so no agenda |
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Wed Nov 25, 2009 8:02 am |
Its toxic in large quantities! What about aloe vera juice?
Coconut wrote: |
Alien wrote: |
Sorry, as an RN, I have to recomend that you NOT use castor oil on such a young child... Skin absorbtion is one isse the other is - everything winds up in a child's mouth... |
castor oil is a natural vegetable oil though, it's edible, how harmful could it be? |
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Wed Nov 25, 2009 10:53 am |
Yes, I wouldn't be giving, or allowing accidental ingestion of aloe vera juice to an infant either |
_________________ I don't buy product from EDS so no agenda |
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Wed Nov 25, 2009 11:14 am |
Wiki has some interesting facts about Castor Oil... http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Castor_oil |
_________________ Claudia of FlexEffect... 43, fair skin, occasional breakout, Using ECO FROG (my own=disclaimer), and TrueScience (I also sell this)... Happy with that...Come visit on FB! |
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Thu Nov 26, 2009 12:00 am |
Sorry I said anything now!
rebecca |
_________________ 47 years old. Battling aging and pigmentation. Using Tria and Pico and Dermapen. |
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Thu Nov 26, 2009 3:38 am |
Thanks everyone for your help. Claudia the sensory issue is interesting!! I'm due to see her specialist soon and I'm going to bring that one up. She's under care at the children's hospital so I assume they would have seen similar things before. When I spoke to him last time he expected her to simply outgrow it but that hasn't happened
I looked up alot of info about castor oil and in the end rang our GP and asked him - it is in fact a old fashioned remedy. He said it wouldn't hurt and the massage may stimulate her scalp so I have been doing it before I wash her hair. I've been using Olive Oil though simply because I don't have castor oil. She seems to be enjoying the massage if anything
Thanks Again .... |
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Fri Nov 27, 2009 8:23 pm |
Sunlit, I have a personal experience with this to share. Grab a coffee, this is long.
About 11 or 12 years ago, the summer before my daughter entered 5th grade, she spent a week with her father (a rare occurrence, he was usually pretty distant) and I think it must have been stressful for her, because when I picked her up, her hair on top was quite thin. Over the next few weeks, it got thinner and thinner. A lot happens at night, as I would find long blond hair on her pillow in the morning. Her babysitter was online (I had no computer) and did some checking and found out about a condition called Trichotillomania(trick-o-tilla-mania). It is compulsive hair pulling. I believe that once a child starts, she finds that it's soothing, in a way that non-pullers cannot understand. To compare, imagine that your arm itches. Imagine not scratching that itch. Makes you crazy, right? So you scratch, and it's soothing and feels good. That is similar to the relief that a trichster (one afflicted with trichotillomania....pronounced "trickster") feels when pulling the hair. Now imagine your arm not itching, but you scratch it anyway. It's irritating, doesn't feel good, and painful to an extent. That kind of shows how non-trichsters feel about pulling...why do it when it obviously hurts. Well, to a puller, it doesn't hurt...it feels good.
My daughter is now 21, and I asked her just now to describe her feelings that she used to have just before a tug. She explained that it's a feeling that that hair must come out...like there's a pimple underneath and if the way isn't cleared, it will just fester. Now, I know that feeling! I'm a compulsive eyelash puller, only when my lids feel swollen, like after a cold or cheap mascara. As long as I give a gentle tug and feel a sharp pain, I know my job isn't done, so I pull until "the offending lashes are purged". Sounds silly, right? It's illogical, but all too real to a puller. This compulsion has been shown to be hereditary.
I took my daughter to a recommended woman derm (my daughter was embarrassed to have a man look at her head)who proceeded not only to embarrass her by parading in some med students without first asking me, but also recommended dandruff shampoo. I did not pay this doctor bill.
Years of haircuts (to attempt to even out the length), hats (worn with special permission from the principal of a school with a no-hat policy), and taunting by classmates went by. Head scarves and bulky gloves worn at bedtime got pulled off during sleep. Self-esteem was nil. She eventually dropped out of high school, and I don't really blame her. I didn't force her to go, I could see how painful school was for her. "Bald bitch" was something she heard hurled towards her on a weekly basis.
A few years ago, my mother bought her a clip-on hairpiece that closely matched the color and length of her existing hair. That was the first time I had seen my daughter smile at herself in the mirror in a long, long time.
A few visits to another derm (a good one this time) proved successful. He took samples of her scalp and diagnosed alopecia. I'm still foggy about all that implies, but I think that Alopecia is a falling out of the hair, and sometimes Trichotillomania and Alopecia can go hand in hand, like maybe what a child pulls out may have fallen out anyway had the compulsion to pull not been there. Anyway, he had a topical medication prescribed for her just about the time her insurance expired and she never picked it up. She was, however, experiencing new hair growth, un-aided by anything. She has been without her hairpiece for about 6 months now and looks just beautiful. Her hair is still a bit thin on top, but she styles it to minimize attention to the top.
I realize my story sounds scary, but my intention is to instill in you this idea: have her seen by a good dermatologist as well as a behavioral therapist, or psychiatrist, or what have you. The horror stories that I just told were a result of, in my opinion, inactivity on my part...I bear that guilt. I didn't do enough. My daughter was old enough to say "I'm not pulling anymore, Mom, really I'm not" so I figured a therapist would be of no help. I see now that a therapist, a good one, could have helped with her self esteem issues. I was turned off to the idea of a dermatologist's help because of what that idiot woman did, and I never looked into having another go at it. The good news is my daughter got her GED before her graduating class at high school got their diplomas (including those that shot hurtful insults at her), she got her CNA, has been working as a CNA for a couple of years now and is now going for her LPN. And looking good doing it!
Your daughter will be fine, and, unlike myself, YOU are going to do all the right things to help her. The internet is a wonderful tool...Google "trichotillomania" and/or "hair pulling", as well as "alopecia"...try including the words "in children". The alopecia is probably not your daughter's issue, but reading up on the condition in children will lead to other, more relevant info. Read up on the latest research....I'm sure there's much more info out there now than there was since I had to find it.
Good doctors, that's my advice based on my flawed experience. Contrary to popular opinion, there are good practitioners who accept all insurance, including state-funded Medicaid, which is what I was on at the time. (Sorry, I don't know where you live or what your situation is, I'm just throwing that out there.) Hopefully, the first ones you find will be effective, but if not, keep plugging away until you find the good ones. The internet and phone inquiries should help you find those that are experienced with hair pullers. My derm (the good one) tried his best to get my kid in to see a colleague with the experience, to no avail, so he did his best at treating her himself, which was pretty good. Good help is there, you just have to find it.
Good luck, and keep us posted.
bluugrass |
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Fri Nov 27, 2009 11:40 pm |
Alien wrote: |
So, your reccomending a LAXATIVE to be used on an already compramised infant?
Natural does not unequivicably equal safe |
So? Prune juice is also a laxative. There isn't anything inherently dangerous about substances that act as laxatives. Castor oil is a laxative by default, you're just associating castor oil with it's other qualities. In fact, there is a strong possibility that you yourself ingested castor oil today because it is used so heavily in industry (food, medicine, etc.). The fact of the matter is, it is mostly just a vegetable oil. Castor oil is the first thing I thought of to use when I read the OP's story. |
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Sat Nov 28, 2009 1:40 am |
Thanks Bluugrass for your story - it must have been a very hard time for you and your daughter. I have been assured by her specialist that this is not her problem. My daughter only just turned 3 and was very premature. The problem began not to pull her hair out but to have the hair to rub against her cheek. I would come in at night to see her with her thumb in her mouth and her hair held against her cheek. Her specialist made it clear it was childhood habit like thumb sucking or having a dummy. Her hair is growing back now she has a sleepsuit on at night - but not growing back fast enough to catch up to the other side. i guess we want to accelerate the growth of her hair - hopefully massaging it before washing it will stimulate her scalp and get things moving. Thanks so much for all the advice. |
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Sat Nov 28, 2009 10:51 am |
Bluugrass... I wonder if this condition runs along side with sensory issues. It seems totally reasonable... many of the activities that we do to meet a sensory need, aren't necessarily ideal. Others are harmless (perhaps more annoying)... Like needing to rock all the time... or gathering pressure by walking very heavy, or even up on your toes... It's wild to learn about!
Sunlit, I often wonder if preemie babies have higher rates of sensory probs. I DO think their bodies are WAY more sensitive to EVERYTHING right away. For example, I know VERY FEW full term babies that went through colic. But almost every baby I've known as a preemie had it...
When you talk with your pedi, ask about having your daughter evaluated by an occupational therapist for children.... They should check all her fine motor skills, her gross motor skills, her speech and her behavior with regard to body movements, and such. Honestly, this can be a VERY overwhelming, for you! PM me if this ends up happening... I'm happy to share our story, to help prepare you for it.
Once an eval is done, they will determine if your child would benefit from recieiving some OT. Which can be just as simple as the 2 of you working with the OT, to help YOU learn how to meet her needs, so they don't get out of control... again, as she gets older, she can learn how to meet her needs without being self destructive... etc...
Personally, I think this type of evaluation should be done for ALL children. The things you learn at your child's young age, I think are off the charts valuable for their success in their education and social skills.
HTH |
_________________ Claudia of FlexEffect... 43, fair skin, occasional breakout, Using ECO FROG (my own=disclaimer), and TrueScience (I also sell this)... Happy with that...Come visit on FB! |
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Sat Nov 28, 2009 1:37 pm |
ClaudiaFE wrote: |
Bluugrass... I wonder if this condition runs along side with sensory issues. It seems totally reasonable... many of the activities that we do to meet a sensory need, aren't necessarily ideal. Others are harmless (perhaps more annoying)... Like needing to rock all the time... or gathering pressure by walking very heavy, or even up on your toes... It's wild to learn about!
Sunlit, I often wonder if preemie babies have higher rates of sensory probs. I DO think their bodies are WAY more sensitive to EVERYTHING right away. For example, I know VERY FEW full term babies that went through colic. But almost every baby I've known as a preemie had it...
When you talk with your pedi, ask about having your daughter evaluated by an occupational therapist for children.... They should check all her fine motor skills, her gross motor skills, her speech and her behavior with regard to body movements, and such. Honestly, this can be a VERY overwhelming, for you! PM me if this ends up happening... I'm happy to share our story, to help prepare you for it.
Once an eval is done, they will determine if your child would benefit from recieiving some OT. Which can be just as simple as the 2 of you working with the OT, to help YOU learn how to meet her needs, so they don't get out of control... again, as she gets older, she can learn how to meet her needs without being self destructive... etc...
Personally, I think this type of evaluation should be done for ALL children. The things you learn at your child's young age, I think are off the charts valuable for their success in their education and social skills.
HTH |
Actually I must agree with this. My son was not premmie, but was born term with pre eclampsia...so he was underweight etc.
I wish I had done the OT evaluation way earlier than I did (eventually at age 6). He seemed to hit his milestones on time, but it would have really helped overall.
Best of luck to you.
rebecca |
_________________ 47 years old. Battling aging and pigmentation. Using Tria and Pico and Dermapen. |
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Wed Dec 09, 2009 3:08 pm |
bluugrass, thank you for sharing your story. It is very honest and insightful. And very positive! you and your daughter went through difficult things but did not let yourselves to be defeated or bitter. Again, thanks for sharing! |
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Wed Dec 09, 2009 8:06 pm |
We all know that good nutrion helps everything - maybe a Rx for vitamins (although a knowledgable friend or health food store owner may be able to lead you in a positive direction also - with the blessing of the Pediatrician, of course! Good luck. |
_________________ Enjoying dermalogica with my ASG and Pico toner ** Disclosure: I was a participant without remuneration in promotional videos for Ageless Secret Gold and the Neurotris Pico Emmy event. |
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Fri Dec 11, 2009 6:46 pm |
The best thing is to the hospital, in the doctor's help, to treatment. On the contrary, dolast is not very good, I face the original Vulgaris, just because you have some products, resulting in damage to the skin, leaving the scar.  |
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Fri Dec 11, 2009 7:27 pm |
Bluegrass your story is very powerful... I'm happy your daughter is doing much better.
I too have always had a bit of this compulsion. I used to and still do to some extent scratch at my scalp during times of stress (mostly before exams and during exams). It really exacerbated a lot of scalp problems. My mom used to tell me I had bloody scabs and patches of irritated scalp. It's sort of itching just thinking about it.
Maybe you could do something special with your daughter so she has a more positive association with her hair. I used to go too many days without shampooing my hair for some reason oh and I swam... Like have fun with her when you take her to get her hair cut or take her with you to buy shampoo and conditioner and make sure she really likes the scent. Maybe if you let her take pride in her hair she will be more gentle on herself. You're lucky you are noticing it so young but I wouldn't hesitate to get another doctor's opinion...
My very humble opinion. I hope your little sweetie is doing alright. |
_________________ 23, fair, EDS newbie, taking Diane 35. |
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