Plastic Sugery Question
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free skin care · Tue Jul 03, 2012 10:36 am

Why don't women like to admit to having had plastic surgery?

It's like almost taboo.

free skin care · Tue Jul 03, 2012 12:43 pm

VeronicaM wrote:

Why don't women like to admit to having had plastic surgery?

It's like almost taboo.

I don't think it's just women that don't like to admit it, but men tend to resort to plastic surgery less often (hence there's less of them to admit).

I think many worry about being perceived as vain, shallow or insecure. After all, if a person accepts who they are, there is no need to modify their physical appearance. I for one am guilty of being insecure. While I've made progress and have learned that I am valued for who I am and not just what I look like by my significant other, social media has conditioned me to strive for the perfect body. I live in a metro area where breast implants are the norm, and until I did some inner personal growth and met the one man who makes me feel loved and valued for who I am, I was ready to shell out the big bucks just to have bigger breasts. Not only was I insecure, but was also rather shallow to believe that implants would fix my insecurity and draw "Mr. Right" to me.
Now that I think about it, had I gotten implants, I most likely would have attracted the wrong kind of men, who were shallow themselves and appreciated outer beauty more than inner. I would have continued to be unhappy because at the back of my mind I would always wonder if those men liked me for me or for my breasts... Hence the insecurity would have deepened.
]
I am not saying that plastic surgery is wrong. I may resort to it in the future, but before I do, I will make sure I am ok with myself and that it would be just some "pampering" like going to the spa, getting a laser treatment, etc. If I take that approach, then I should have no problem admitting to any plastic surgery procedure, because I would know that it does not represent who I am and that it's just a slight improvement to my outer appearance. Obviously, I would only pick subtle improvements Smile

(ETA: "pampering" as in subtle changes that make me feel younger, like maybe a mini face lift, fractional laser, etc... I know going to the spa
is not getting plastic surgery Smile

)

Just MHO. Smile

free skin care · Tue Jul 03, 2012 2:05 pm

I've alway been upfront with the cosmetic surgeries I've had done. I don't really care what others think. They don't have to carry around two DDD-cup boobies all day and suffer from back pain and constant staring/jokes like I did. Breast reduction was one of the best things I've every done. I've also had surgery for a serious underbite (everyone always assumed I was angry all the time) that my dentist said if I didn't have it done, I would eventually grind down my teeth.

I've also had my lower lip reduced and an upper/lower bleph. Yes, those were more for vanity reasons, but like I said, I don't care what others think of me doing it. It raised my self-esteem and that's all that mattered. Wink

free skin care · Tue Jul 03, 2012 2:09 pm

sandooch wrote:

I've alway been upfront with the cosmetic surgeries I've had done. I don't really care what others think. They don't have to carry around two DDD-cup boobies all day and suffer from back pain and constant staring/jokes like I did. Breast reduction was one of the best things I've every done. I've also had surgery for a serious underbite (everyone always assumed I was angry all the time) that my dentist said if I didn't have it done, I would eventually grind down my teeth.

I've also had my lower lip reduced and an upper/lower bleph. Yes, those were more for vanity reasons, but like I said, I don't care what others think of me doing it. It raised my self-esteem and that's all that mattered. Wink

Sandooch, I don't think your first two can be considered true plastic surgery. You clearly needed those to stay healthy.
As for the lip/eye lid - those are the kind of subtle improvements I was referring to Smile

free skin care · Tue Jul 03, 2012 3:12 pm

I think its because the idea of being naturally beautiful is more appealing, or so the person believes

free skin care · Tue Jul 03, 2012 5:10 pm

fitgineer wrote:

sandooch wrote:

I've alway been upfront with the cosmetic surgeries I've had done. I don't really care what others think. They don't have to carry around two DDD-cup boobies all day and suffer from back pain and constant staring/jokes like I did. Breast reduction was one of the best things I've every done. I've also had surgery for a serious underbite (everyone always assumed I was angry all the time) that my dentist said if I didn't have it done, I would eventually grind down my teeth.

I've also had my lower lip reduced and an upper/lower bleph. Yes, those were more for vanity reasons, but like I said, I don't care what others think of me doing it. It raised my self-esteem and that's all that mattered. Wink

Sandooch, I don't think your first two can be considered true plastic surgery. You clearly needed those to stay healthy.
As for the lip/eye lid - those are the kind of subtle improvements I was referring to Smile

I guess that's true for the first two.

I just couldn't imagine not fessing up to the second two though, especially to people I haven't seen in a while and I know they can see an obvious difference. I mean, who am I trying to fool? One day my eyelids are hooded and they see me a couple months later and those heavy lids are nowhere to be found? No eye cream does that, my friend! Laughing

free skin care · Wed Jul 04, 2012 12:53 am

Fitgeneer
I agree with all you just said there. I do think self esteem and confidence has a huge element in this, our society is soo youth orientated, the pressure to be "beautiful" is enormous, unfortunately we also ( me included) get sucked into it too.

Naomi Wolf in "The Beauty Myth', kind of spelt it out for me when I was in my eating nothing phase., about the pressure on young women, to have this Thin thin size 0 look that is soo androgynous,as to be lacking any form of female sexuality.

And I think the no allowance for looking our age is all tied up together with the size thing too.

Is it overall a control thing, ie

"keep the little women obsesssing with face, figure" so she will spend and spend on ad nauseaum looking for that elixir to fend of the basic insecurity?
Or what?

Oh dear, painkillers are making me sound like a conspiracy theorist or at least paranoid?

We are not like this really

Laughing

free skin care · Wed Jul 04, 2012 12:55 am

Mind you I wouldnt say no to it when the time came Rolling Eyes

free skin care · Wed Jul 04, 2012 10:00 am

I guess because they want people to think they look that way naturally. If it were me I'd admit to it.

free skin care · Wed Jul 04, 2012 10:14 am

Cat_eyes wrote:

I guess because they want people to think they look that way naturally. If it were me I'd admit to it.

I agree. I would admit it if, or when, I choose to have anything done. I have to add I think it's ironic that 'born beautiful peeps' think it's some kind of accomplishment they've attained...had nothing to do with you dude, that long line of genetic history determined your natural state. lol

free skin care · Wed Jul 04, 2012 11:03 am

Here's me at my granddaughters birthday party a few weeks ago..... remember I had fl a couple years ago? then some fat injections in my face, plus I had laser skin resurfacing..... I tell everyone, honestly I'm almost 62, I would NOT look like this.

Thanks to John Hilinski, he makes people look real not scary or strange. I think the more money you have as in celebrities the worse you can look. Also I think the new trend in PS is to make you look refreshed and attractive, not necessarily 25 years younger.

free skin care · Wed Jul 04, 2012 11:29 am

secretly,

you look really great, whatever you have and are doing is terrific.

free skin care · Wed Jul 04, 2012 12:08 pm

secretly wrote:

Here's me at my granddaughters birthday party a few weeks ago..... remember I had fl a couple years ago? then some fat injections in my face, plus I had laser skin resurfacing..... I tell everyone, honestly I'm almost 62, I would NOT look like this.

Thanks to John Hilinski, he makes people look real not scary or strange. I think the more money you have as in celebrities the worse you can look. Also I think the new trend in PS is to make you look refreshed and attractive, not necessarily 25 years younger.

your dr was did a fantastic job on your fl!! He def refreshed your face! You look amazing for any age!

free skin care · Wed Jul 04, 2012 12:20 pm

THANKS ya'll, and isn't it kind of silly to say I've not had anything done? Even total strangers say how young I look, like cashiers in stores when they look at my license and see my age. I always say, I've had cosmetic work, and women love to hear this, it's like oohhhhhh.....and permission for them to do it too.

one young sales clerk said, "I can't wait" cause just knowing you have the option when the time comes, and its not SO expensive anymore.

free skin care · Wed Jul 04, 2012 2:00 pm

secretly wrote:

THANKS ya'll, and isn't it kind of silly to say I've not had anything done? Even total strangers say how young I look, like cashiers in stores when they look at my license and see my age. I always say, I've had cosmetic work, and women love to hear this, it's like oohhhhhh.....and permission for them to do it too.

one young sales clerk said, "I can't wait" cause just knowing you have the option when the time comes, and its not SO expensive anymore.

A big part of the trick is the Dr., as you said one who does softening not full blown your standing in front of a fan look!

free skin care · Wed Jul 04, 2012 2:12 pm

secretly wrote:

THANKS ya'll, and isn't it kind of silly to say I've not had anything done? Even total strangers say how young I look, like cashiers in stores when they look at my license and see my age. I always say, I've had cosmetic work, and women love to hear this, it's like oohhhhhh.....and permission for them to do it too.

one young sales clerk said, "I can't wait" cause just knowing you have the option when the time comes, and its not SO expensive anymore.

I recall when you first posted Secretly and I was amazed just how great you look (very pretty anyway) but you had great results!

I know women who just can't tell they had any tweaks, just like they won't say their age, me I could care less, if I had some done I would not care one bit!

free skin care · Wed Jul 04, 2012 4:32 pm

i work for a plastic surgeon and there are those who would go to their friends and tell everyone at the waiting room what they've had done....and then there are those who would hide it from everyone including their husbands/wives. I think that the average person who doesn't have thousands and thousands of dollars to spend on "vanity" would feel a bit guilty getting cosmetic surgery done when they can put that into their children's college education or something along those lines so they feel shameful in letting people know. Plastic surgery has always been taboo, but it's much more mainstream now than it's ever been. I guess it's viewed negatively to some because it's not "natural" beauty or the fact that a person would be risking their life to go under the knife for cosmetic purposes, or what cosmetic surgery does for the feminist movement etc. I guess some people just don't want to be judged from their peers for having cosmetic surgery.

free skin care · Thu Jul 05, 2012 8:32 am

I have always been very honest about my botox and upper/lower blpehs, maybe to the point of blurting it out, haha. But I don't hide it for sure. The botox I have so infrequently it looks pretty natural and I never have it all at the same time, a different place here or there. I thelps not have that mask look.
My SIL likes to ask" Oh, you look good, have you had work done?" To which I then reply in my sweetest voice, "Nope, I am just HAPPY"!!!! Laughing

Secretly, you look amazing!!!!!

free skin care · Thu Jul 05, 2012 8:46 am

Annie R

nice one hope I can be as quick with the response as you when the time comes Bad Grin

free skin care · Thu Jul 05, 2012 10:42 am

Secretly, before seeing your age in your signature, my first thought was that you were around 48, no more than 50. Wow! You look wonderful.

free skin care · Thu Jul 05, 2012 1:17 pm

Thankfully, cosmetic surgery is coming out of the closet, like a lot of other previous social taboos we live with.

Where do these taboos come from? IMO, fear, jealousy, insecurity etc. - consider even the name "plastic surgery" - plastic as in, fake.

I think we resent people who somehow manage to "cheat" the process.

I say get over it.

secretly, you look fabulous and I love the silky hair Smile

BFG

free skin care · Thu Jul 05, 2012 1:43 pm

I'd be happy to tell anyone anything I've done. Haven't done a thing yet, but I would. I am not sure when someone said you look great, I'd divulge it all there, but if asked, I happily would. Laughing

free skin care · Thu Jul 05, 2012 1:44 pm

Secretly, did the same doctor do your fat injections? You look fantastic!

free skin care · Thu Jul 05, 2012 4:40 pm

I think people (men and women) will admit to family and friends (probably more close friends, not just acquaintances) because they feel it's not anybody else's business, and maybe they're a private person. They just don't go around and advertise it to everyone.

free skin care · Fri Jul 06, 2012 7:16 am

I never mind saying only because I feel like if somehting I have done can help someone else feel better about themselves then great I just don't like snarkey comments. But that's what I get for eve mentioning anything to SIL, now even when I have a good night's sleep, it must show! Although I just found out that she recently went and had dysport but it didn't take in her 11's.
I think sometimes people also just don't always KNOW what can be done, fillers, botox, etc. and how natural they CAN look when done/used correctly.
I don't like the look when it is obvious that something has been done or OVERdone, haha. That then becomes weird and just helps promote the naysayers.
I feel it should make you look fresh, natural and help you look more "rested" but still like yourself, maybe just a few years younger.

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