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The meaning/purpose of life
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ebbyboob
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Mon Feb 21, 2005 12:53 pm      Reply with quote
Hi all,

I've been struggling with this question for the last couple of years now, and I'm sure I'll be wrestling with it for a few more. But I just wanted to take a break from talk about the best moisturizers or cleansing treatments to get some opinions on what the meaning of life is. I know there is no one right answer, but I am trying to find an answer that works for me. I haven't found one yet though, so please reply and let me (and everyone else on the forum) know what you think the point of our human existence is on this planet/ in this universe. (I'm not writing a paper on this or anything- it's just for my own personal fulfillment).
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Mon Feb 21, 2005 1:03 pm      Reply with quote
I have to admit I don't think of the meaning of life, I just try to enjoy it and not regret trying new things.
ebbyboob
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Mon Feb 21, 2005 1:31 pm      Reply with quote
Addendum: The main reason I ask this question is b/c here in the US the purpose of someone's life seems to be defined in either the acquisition of wealth and material goods- houses, cars, jewelry, make up Very Happy - or in terms of a person's career- doctor, lawyer, trashman. So it's really depressing when it seems like our lives are valued according to these superficial standards that don't really get down to the core of what being human means. I mean what on earth are we here for?!?!
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Mon Feb 21, 2005 2:51 pm      Reply with quote
To Love....
Penelope
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Mon Feb 21, 2005 3:23 pm      Reply with quote
ebbyboob:

Do you mind me asking how old you are? Are you a student? A mother? I'm trying to determine your point of reference before I answer your question. Your thoughts sound like mine did 30 years ago.
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Mon Feb 21, 2005 3:33 pm      Reply with quote
My son is 11 and he's been asking me the question for 2 years...... I just tell him to ask his Teacher, as I wonder if I have a normal child... Laughing
ebbyboob
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Mon Feb 21, 2005 3:47 pm      Reply with quote
Penelope, I'm 21 yrs old and a senior in college about to enter the big, scary, REAL world, and I can't figure out what place I should take in it. I have no idea what I'm going to do after I graduate and nothing even seems appealing- further school, work, travel- nothing. After 30 years, what kinds of answers or just realizations have you had about what we're all doing here? And Cindi, consider your son a genius! I think it's great that he's asking these questions early on- as long as he doesn't get too obssessed or depressed over the question as I have Embarassed .
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Mon Feb 21, 2005 4:13 pm      Reply with quote
Since those where the same questions I had so many years ago I had a funny feeling about your age and student status. Please try not to obsess about a career path because it will probably change several times over the course of your life. It is, however, extremely difficult for recent college grads to land employment right now but this too will improve over the next few years (it's cyclical). Remember, there is a reason for EVERYTHING. When I was your age I wanted to change the world or at least make it a better place so I became a social worker but was totally burned out (emotionally) after a few years. After becoming a mother at the age of 30, I learned that I am making the world a better place – by taking care of MY little corner of the world – which is certainly realistic and attainable. My advice to you is to keep an open mind, take risks, try new things and don’t let the opinions of others impact your decisions. It’s tough finding your place in this world but you will - just do it on your terms.
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Mon Feb 21, 2005 6:10 pm      Reply with quote
ebbyboob,

I did 4 years of college and still didn't know what I wanted to do. I worked a few different jobs before I came across one that appealed to me. This past september I went back to school (4 years after leaving) to get a business degree and am really happy. My grades are MUCH better now and I'm more motivated now that I have an idea of what I want to do in the future.

I think most people have the same feelings as you between 21 and 24...You'll find what you want to do...you just need to try different things to find it. I never thought I'd be interested in business...but I really like it.
ebbyboob
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Mon Feb 21, 2005 10:14 pm      Reply with quote
Thanks everyone for your responses. I know I'll travel down many diff roads in my lifetime, but my parents don't seem to like that idea. They had a certain plan mapped out for me, and since I don't seem to be following the program they aren't showing much support, which scares me b/c I'm not doing what they say (and they seemingly know best) but I don't know what I even want! It's like I'm blindly wondering around hoping I'll happen upon something I love and some great reason for loving life! Sorry for the rant. Everyone around me has been hearing it so I guess I had to extend it to cyberspace. There's a loooong road ahead...
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Mon Feb 21, 2005 11:06 pm      Reply with quote
It sounds like you're putting too much pressure on yourself. Don't sweat it. I'm 35 and still don't know what I want to be when I grow up. It's a big mistake to live your life to fulfill your parents' dreams for you. I was supposed to be a lawyer but I dropped out of university. My husband has two degrees and we both ended up working on boats. Our policy in life is to make sure that our ratio between work and play always slants heavily toward play. Sometimes I struggle with the meaning of it all and get the "why bother" blues, but then something magical always happens. These days I just have to visit with my baby niece on the webcam to snap out of it. To paraphrase trueblu, it's all about love.
Liz

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Tue Feb 22, 2005 1:01 am      Reply with quote
I am 43 and I have done several things since leaving school. I still don't know what I really want to do when I grow up. I work a job that is ok, pays the skincare bills, but I am still looking for the thing that will make me really fulfilled and happy.
I can say the years bringing up my children eldest 23 youngest 17 on sunday gave me the biggest sense of pleasure, contentment and achievement I have ever felt. Sorry if I sound dull.
I really think you should enjoy your young years. Don't let your parents force you into a decision you may regret. They are living the life they chose for themselves. You have the same rights to make your own choices.
It is not a perfect world, we just have to do the best we can and remember that at the end of the day you come into the world with nothing and go out the same way.
omg I sound old.(no sarky comments, thank you)

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Tue Feb 22, 2005 3:14 am      Reply with quote
I've spent plenty of time navel gazing in reflection, even went on to study philosophy at uni and it's a question that has been asked for as long as we've been here and my conclusion is that it means anything you want it to mean.

Some people think it's about having money & an 'important' job, well imagine the world where no one empties the bins or takes away your trash. Some people think it's all about looking your best..well what happens to you when your beauty goes? you have to go to? you don't matter as a human being?

Some people think it's to have kids, is your dna so special? is mine?

My way is to be as honest as I can without ego. Sometimes though that can be misinterpreted. Confused
Coolnat352
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Tue Feb 22, 2005 10:12 am      Reply with quote
loopylori wrote:
I can say the years bringing up my children eldest 23 youngest 17 on sunday gave me the biggest sense of pleasure, contentment and achievement I have ever felt.

omg I sound old.(no sarky comments, thank you)


Its because the youngest one is amazing!lol Very Happy yes 17 on sunday and don't you forget mother! Laughing

You sound old because you are old!Very Happy Image love you really!

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Coolnat352
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Tue Feb 22, 2005 10:31 am      Reply with quote
Ebbyboob

There will never be an answer to that question to satisfy everyone. It is an ongoing debate that only you can decide for yourself what the meaning of your life is. It's a personal thing depending on the sort of person you are. Some people are activists and want to make the world a better place,some dedicate their lives to a god or other religious group,some decide being parents are the way to fulfil their lives and others decide they are best at working and making the world run more smoothly in that way! Some people lives are based around their career and career enhancement. As long as you are happy with whatever you do then it can't be that bad. If something is not satisfying you then it is not the right thing for you to do/be doing!

You can't let other people influence your decision on what you want out of life.

Maybe you should spend some time thinking or write a list about what you really do want to do/achieve/become and what makes you happy in life.

The meaning of life for me is to be happy and succeed with your dreams.
I am going travelling next year(for a year) to Africa,Australia and Thailand. For 3months of this i will be volunteering with children or animals in Africa and Thailand. This is what i've always wanted to do and know this will make me happy. I've always wanted to go and help the less fortunate than me and i know this will bring immense satisfaction and meaning to my life. After that i will probably get a job as a beautician and continue with my life here in England but you never know what the future will bring.

You just have to realise your dream and not your parents dream for you.

Good Luck with finding an answer to your question that makes sense to you.

P.S Sorry this was long!Very Happy

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Tue Feb 22, 2005 11:04 am      Reply with quote
I've been asking myself the same question for several years, too .... I remember a line from the movie "City Slicker", it says "life is about the ONE thing". I dont know how many have found that one thing. I am still searching .... Yes, happiness for sure, but what makes you happy, what ticks you? For now, my fulfillment is coming from career advancement. It may look silly later down the road....
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Tue Feb 22, 2005 11:55 am      Reply with quote
Lori (and CoolNat352):

You have given your daughter the best gift in life (after life itself) - to reach for her own dreams. You must be so very proud of her - I have tears in my eyes after reading Nats post. How fortunate she is and best of all, I think she knows it!
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Tue Feb 22, 2005 12:52 pm      Reply with quote
Penelope,
Thank you.
I have always within reason allowed my children to live their own lives and make their own decisions. They are all fantastic actually and I am very proud of them. I try to support them whatever they choose to do. I guess I am lucky that they don't choose to do bad things. May it always be that way.
Also I lost a son through SIDS before Nat was born and it made appreciate that life is a gift and we should cherish those we love. You never know what may happen. Life is to short to waste.

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Tue Feb 22, 2005 1:36 pm      Reply with quote
Crying or Very sad Wow! Lori you are awesome. Nat is a very wise young woman. You must be so proud. Raising children has been my biggest life accomplishment. Now, I just look into their children's eyes(my grandchildren) and see what my life was all about. The meaning of life for me is love. Being a wife and mother is really all I ever wanted from life. God blessed me with a wonderful husband, children and grandchildren.
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Tue Feb 22, 2005 2:21 pm      Reply with quote
ebbyboob wrote:
Thanks everyone for your responses. I know I'll travel down many diff roads in my lifetime, but my parents don't seem to like that idea. They had a certain plan mapped out for me, and since I don't seem to be following the program they aren't showing much support, which scares me b/c I'm not doing what they say (and they seemingly know best) but I don't know what I even want! It's like I'm blindly wondering around hoping I'll happen upon something I love and some great reason for loving life! Sorry for the rant. Everyone around me has been hearing it so I guess I had to extend it to cyberspace. There's a loooong road ahead...


Ebbyboob, please don't get your parents lack of support get you down. Easier said than done, I know. Just remember, what doesn't kill ya makes ya stronger Wink

I actually think its great you don't yet know what you want. Keep your heart open and enjoy each day as it comes. If you worry too much about the future you miss out on today.
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Tue Feb 22, 2005 3:04 pm      Reply with quote
Winnie wrote:
Nat is a very wise young woman. You must be so proud.

Totally agree with you there, Winnie. Smile
I wish I was that clued up when I was 16 (nearly 17 Very Happy ).
With a lot of young people being portrayed as anti-social dimwits, it's great to see that there is at least one out there who has the courage and determination to go out on her own and help those less fortunate than herself.
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Wed Feb 23, 2005 12:06 pm      Reply with quote
Okay, I realize that this is a serious topic and I don’t mean this post as factitious or disrespectful, but someone sent this joke to me and I thought it was seemed relevant so I had to share:

A teacher asked her class, "What do you want out of life?"

A little girl in the back row raised her hand and said, “All I want out of life is four little animals".

The teacher asked, "Really and what four little animals would that be, sugar?"

The little girl said, "A mink on my back, a jaguar in the garage, a tiger in the bed and a jackass to pay for all of it."

The teacher fainted.


Unfortunately, there are a good many folks out there who believe that this is, indeed, the meaning of life. Confused
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Wed Feb 23, 2005 4:06 pm      Reply with quote
I have no idea what the meaning of life is - and I think that's part of the magic for me. I have absolutely no idea what I'm doing on this planet (literally).... and I am amazed that here we all are, spinning around on this big rock in space! I find the "not knowing" very comforting, and humbling...I truly believe that ultimately, I am not in control(literally) - which, to me, is liberating. Every birthday represents one more complete "trip around the sun" and THAT amazes me. On another note: I've heard some people say (not here..) that a life well-lived has to be one punctuated by hardship..... and I don't believe that is neccessarily true....While I've always believed that that which doesn't kill you will usually make you stronger, I refuse to subscribe to the notion that "joy" is a luxury of the well-kept; or that joy, in and of itself is not empowering or strengthening - because I believe that it is. And emotionally, I don't think we should "strive" to be happy - we should "decide" to be happy...move your emotional person into a place where you are "deciding" not "striving"... put yourself in emotional control - I think it represents a subtle, yet profound shift in thinking that's made all the difference to the quality of my life. Happiness, and joy aren't destinations - they are decisions--for me, that notion is incredibly empowering. Anyways, all this to say that I don't think that there neccessarily IS a meaning to life or at least not any meaning that we will universally come to accept or agree upon in my lifetime. And while I don't have a clue what the "meaning of life" is, I do know how to make my life meaningful - and I think that's the trick - for me, anyway. And I never let myself forget that here I am, spinning around the sun.....not knowing whether or not the universe is going to fold in on itself, or if some God is going to swoop me up and take me away! It's humbling and reminds me of a cliché that represents, in spirit, the closest I think I will ever get to understanding anything - and that is that "the answer to the question is in the journey". Anyways - holy moly, I've gone on and on...OK, that's it for me!
Pudoodles, out.
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Wed Feb 23, 2005 10:11 pm      Reply with quote
I strongly believe that there is a purpose to life. We should strive to do good during our brief stay on this planet. We should remember to be grateful for every blessing we have, no matter how small -- because every breath of air, every morsel of food and every ray of sunshine is a gift to us. Sometimes it is hard to find one's path in life, but it helps to take a step back and gain a larger perspective. We can get caught up in details and time limits, but in the end none of that matters.

Being 21 is a tough age, I admit. The best advice I can give you is to 'go with the flow'. Try out things you are curious about, and something you love will eventually fall into your lap. And don't let your parents get you down! It is your life, and try to remember that they mean well and want the best for you. While I don't think material goods should be one's objective in life, it does take a few years to realize just how important money is. It allows you the freedom to pursue what you love and to take care of yourself should you fall ill or get into some trouble. It is good that you have earned an education so you are better prepared to take care of yourself as an adult.
ebbyboob
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Thu Feb 24, 2005 12:57 am      Reply with quote
I agree with Pudoodles that happiness is a decision not a destination and that the answer to life is arrived at through the journey. But the thing that gets me about life is all the evil in the world. Why are humans so mean and evil to each other both on a worldwide scale (wars) and even through mundane, everyday things. I used to be idealistic and think that I could change the world, but I just don't even see the use anymore of dedicating my life to any cause like that b/c there's too much wrong in the world. I wouldn't be able to make a little dent! And if I did someone would just come along and knock it right back out of place. ARRRGGG! It's so hard to find meaning in a world full of meaningless suffering, hate, and violence. Why can't we all just be nice to each other. Part of being humane is being human!!! I just...I dunno Crying or Very sad
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